"Dad, I'm sorry, my divorce is a disgrace to you." the father's answer went viral on moments.
Dear daughter:
you say that you don't have a good time in your mother-in-law's house, and no matter what you do, your parents-in-law have to be picky.
the food is not to your taste, saying that you are too stupid;
Let your son-in-law do some work and scold you for being too lazy;
son-in-law boos to you and thinks you are too delicate.
can't give birth to a boy, blame you for being incompetent.
obviously you have tried very hard to do everything well, but they are just not satisfied.
Dad was very distressed after hearing what you said.
from small to big, you are always sunny and optimistic.
this time, you must have suffered a lot of grievances, otherwise, you wouldn't have complained to your parents.
Dad blames himself for not keeping a good watch for you.
Dad couldn't sleep all night, so he wrote you this letter.
daughter,
you never owe your husband's family
Dad read a sentence on the Internet:
"when a daughter-in-law marries her mother-in-law, she serves her parents-in-law."
I don't know who said this, but Dad didn't agree with it at all.
whose daughter didn't grow up in the palm of her parents' hands. She didn't have a mouthful of food or water before getting married, so she became a servant when she arrived at her in-law's house.
if you don't do a good job, you may even be accused of being "unfilial".
daughter, Dad knows that you have been trying to play the role of daughter-in-law because you are afraid of other people's gossip.
in order not to embarrass your husband, you swallow many grievances by yourself.
Dad can't help thinking of the TV series Welcome I watched some time ago, in which there was a scene in which Dad was particularly impressed.
Tong Nana, who has been wronged by her mother-in-law for a long time, said something like this:
"Mom, I know you are not satisfied with me. I respect you as an elder. I do not want to argue with you. I think that people's hearts grow in flesh. As long as I use my heart, even if it is stone, I can cover it up."
but now I realize that you don't regard me as a family at all. Since there is no one to speak for me in this family, I can only speak for myself. "
her stiff attitude finally made her mother-in-law realize her mistake.
daughter, my father taught you from an early age that you should be calm and learn to be patient when something happens.
this tolerance is not blindly patient and compromise, but to a certain extent.
exceeds this degree, don't put up with it any longer.
you never owe your mother-in-law. There is no need to wronge yourself. You should know how to speak for yourself.
you must understand that a compromise marriage cannot be exchanged for happiness.
when you turn wronged yourself into a habit, eventually, you will gradually lose yourself in this habit.
to live is not to meet other people's expectations.
if you need to be wronged to be a good daughter, wife and daughter-in-law, your father would rather you not be so "good".
Life is only a few decades, and Dad hopes that you can do what you want to do and become the person you want to be.
Don't give in or please deliberately, as long as you have a clear conscience.
lower expectations of parents-in-law,
you won't be disappointed
Dad will tell you a story first.
an old lady has a son and a daughter.
when she was at her daughter's house, she was very happy to see that her son-in-law always took the initiative to do housework, didn't have to do anything, and took good care of her daughter.
but when she was at her son's house, she saw that her daughter-in-law did not do housework, almost all by her son, and she was very angry and thought that her daughter-in-law was not sensible.
daughter, have you found that daughter and daughter-in-law and mother-in-law will really be treated differently?
parents can indulge your little capriciousness and tolerate your bad temper, but your parents-in-law won't, because they have no obligation to spoil you and spoil you.
you can joke with your parents as much as you like, but if you joke with your parents-in-law, you should be careful.
in your mother's house, you can lie in bed and wait for your parents to cook, but in your mother-in-law's house, you need to help in the kitchen.
as your parents' baby, you can be yourself as much as you like.
but as a daughter-in-law, you should always remember your identity and exercise discretion in speaking and doing things in front of your parents-in-law.
it's a little unfair to you, though.
after all, the status of daughter-in-law makes you more bound and less free.
and this is what my father does not have the ability to change.
in your mother-in-law's family, you are aggrieved because you feel that you do not get the reward you deserve for your efforts.
you try so hard to fit into that new home, but in the end, you live like an outsider, even worse than an outsider.
the reason for this is often due to your high expectations of your parents-in-law.
Dad really can't bear to see you like this. If you can, Dad would like to bear it for you.
the writer Ma de has such a sentence:
"I gradually understand why I am not happy, because I always expect a result."
daughter, Dad hopes that you can let go of your expectations of your parents-in-law and spend more time on it.Take care of your mood.
Nowhere else you can find such a magnificent purple short prom attire. Buy now and enjoy 70% discounts!
when you are in a good mood, you will let go of many things.
Dad believes that if you can do this, your marriage will be a different landscape.
the man you married,
you must be able to afford the rest of your life
daughter, do you remember?
when you give birth to Niuniu, your son-in-law is always busy taking care of you. He is more nervous and distressed than anyone else.
later, Niu Niu was admitted to the neonatal ward because of jaundice, and your eyes were swollen with tears.
son-in-law is obviously very upset, but he still does everything possible to make you happy.
at that time, my father thought that such a man would certainly give you happiness.
I just didn't expect that in the past year, you have fallen into pain because of the problem of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
some people say that the root cause of the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is men.
because of him, you have a connection with your parents-in-law.
if he can't reconcile the relationship between you and your parents-in-law well, in the end, all of you may get hurt.
Dad doesn't dare to imagine you getting hurt. If he can't even protect you, how can Dad trust you to him?
as an experienced person, Dad knows clearly:
A few years before his marriage, he changed from a son to a husband and father, and the problem of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law almost caught him by surprise.
his parents on one side and his lover on the other, no matter which side he stands on, he is bound to hurt the other.
if he can take a positive attitude and actively cooperate with you to solve the problem, I believe that no matter what kind of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law problem, he can easily solve it.
in many cases, jumping out of the problem itself will make the problem better solved.
but if he always faces it with a negative attitude, or even stands indiscriminately on the side of his parents-in-law, he chooses to hurt you.
Dad advises you to stop your loss in time.
even if he tries hard, Dad will take you away from him.
Dad is afraid that you will get hurt, and he is even more afraid that you will be stuck in the wrong marriage for the rest of your life.
you know, marriage has never been a must in life.
with Dad, nothing else can do as long as you are happy.
there is a line in the TV series "Heart House":
"you have to be strong, others are good to you, you can get by, and if others are not good to you, you have to be able to get by. That's what you can do. "
this is what a father said to his daughter after she was angry in her mother-in-law's family.
in fact, this is also the voice of my father.
daughter, if your parents are not with you, no matter how much you love and love you, there is no way to solve all the problems in your marriage.
more often, you need to face it alone.
Dad hopes you can be brave.
it is said that marriage is a spiritual practice.
if you can achieve good results with your son-in-law and walk happily to the end, your father will be very happy.
if you can't work together for a lifetime, go back to your parents.
well, that's all. I don't know what happened. Since you got married, Dad has become more and more nagging.
I only wish my baby can be happy in marriage and be a better myself in marriage!
-- Love your father forever
Marriage is our VS problem, and no one can be left alone.
, if there is a person who protects you all his life, you can believe that he really loves you.